I really don’t like change.
When I think of change, I think of something that clanks and jingles with every step I take, informing those around me, “Yep, she’s the one making noise.”
Besides that, it is heavy. I would rather have five one dollar bills any day over five hundred pennies in my pocket when I walk down the street.
I also don’t enjoy life changes. That’s not completely true. I love the excitement post-change. I love looking at the end result. But I really don’t like the feeling I get when I immediately find out something is changing.
Life never seems to stay in one place. It is always changing, regardless of my opinion about it.
At times, I have my course set. I know my destination. I know my method of transportation. And at times, I have scenic detours and rest stops planned out along the way. But what I don’t have planned is the occasional road block or construction detour that takes me on a different course. When I approach these blockages or detours, my first reaction is to fight back. Get frustrated. But why?
I realized I worry. I worry the detour won’t really take me to the right destination. That somewhere along the way I will miss a sign telling me to turn and get back to the road I originally planned on taking. I worry that the detour won’t be right, maybe someone put the sign up on the wrong intersection and I will get lost in an unfamiliar place.
Rather than enjoying the scenery I would never have experienced before, I worry.
“And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life?”
“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”
As I begin to worry about the unknowns of life, I am gently reminded of these truths Jesus spoke. Ultimately, what will worrying do for me but waste away time in my life. I can trust God for all. As I seek God and his righteousness, the necessities of life are arranged in my life and I see what is truly important.
But how? How do I surrender my worries and seek his righteousness? That was my second thought. Frankly, I don’t know the right answer. What I do know is it is a continuous surrendering and seeking.
Now… what to do with this 27 cents on the table in front of me…